


Now without you (I'm a soul forever haunted)

by GMRivers



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Adrien Agreste Needs a Hug, Adrien Agreste/Marinette Dupain-Cheng Fluff, Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe, Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Blood and Violence, Canon-Typical Violence, Crime Fighting, Designer Marinette Dupain-Cheng, F/M, Falling In Love, Flashbacks, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Gun Violence, Hawkmoth Defeat, Heroic Adrien Agreste, Hurt/Comfort, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Sorry, Identity Reveal, Marinette Dupain-Cheng Needs a Hug, Memories, Missions, Missions Gone Wrong, Model Adrien Agreste, POV Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir, POV Alternating, POV Marinette Dupain-Cheng, POV Multiple, Post-Canon, Secret Identity, Unrequited Love, Villains
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-23
Updated: 2019-09-23
Packaged: 2020-10-26 20:35:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20748353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GMRivers/pseuds/GMRivers
Summary: When she was thirteen years old, Marinette met one of the most important persons in her life. Together, they were unstoppable. They found someone who could see them when no one else could.When they turned seventeen years old, they were together. Victorious. There was nothing left to fight. They had seen each other, but always through a mask.When they were seventeen years old, the heroes of Paris defeated hawkmoth.When they were seventeen years old, the heroes of Paris disappeared.When she was seventeen years old, Marinette lost one of the most important persons in her life.She thought she could leave it all behind.And now she needs to go back.





	Now without you (I'm a soul forever haunted)

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Fermeture](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5505869) by [KarmaHope](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KarmaHope/pseuds/KarmaHope). 

> Hi! Please read the tags before reading.

PART ONE: Chrysanthemums

> Tell me, when did you get to decide?
> 
> Was it a matter of pride?
> 
> If it's the price of betraying
> 
> What is it i'm paying?
> 
> It's overdue
> 
> Your reason is overdue
> 
> C'mon i just want the truth
> 
> Do i resemble the rage and the chains
> 
> That tied you down?
> 
> \- The Warning (Red hands never fade)

* * *

When she was thirteen years old, Marinette met one of the most important persons in her life.

Together, they were unstoppable. They laughed, and they talked, they soared and they fell, and they got back up. _Together_. They chased shadows at night, and fought their fears by day. They found someone who could see them where no one else could. Even when they were alone, magic brought them together.

When they turned seventeen years old, they were together. They smiled, and they cried, they soared and they fell, and they got back up. _Victorious_. The shadows were gone, and there was nothing left to fight. They had seen each other, but always through a mask. When they were alone, there was no more magic to bring them together.

When they were seventeen years old, the heroes of Paris defeated hawkmoth.

When they were seventeen years old, the heroes of Paris disappeared.

When she was seventeen years old, Marinette lost one of the most important persons in her life.

Twenty-three year old Marinette always hated this time of the year, but this year was bound to be one of the hardest. The sixth yearly ball for the heroes of Paris was right around the corner. She couldn't believe six years had passed. Six years since the defeat of Hawkmoth. Six years without her partner. _Six years without Chat._ The ball was invitation only, and though both Ladybug and Chat Noir were always invited to the ball, they had no way of attending without their Miraculous. The people of Paris had never seen their heroes outside of their masks, and even the most elaborate costume was missing something essentially natural, _essentially magical_, to pass as the original. No one would have let a simple baker's daughter inside, let alone a teenager in a costume (_and how that had ripped her apart, the first few years, to know that he might be waiting inside those walls, just out of her reach)_

This year, she was invited. Not as ladybug, but as Marinette Dupain-Cheng, up and coming designer and protégé of Italian fashion giant Marco Gianopolis. But heaven help her, _she didn't want to go. _

She didn't want to face the shimmering decorations, and the elegant ladies in red dresses, and the shiny cat paws on gentlemen's cuffs. She didn't want to listen to stranger after stranger speaking about their heroes. Of _knowing_ they were _brave_, and _kind_, and _great_, when even their heroes never got to truly know each other.

Once upon a time, she would have given anything to be let inside. _Anything_ for a chance of finding her _chaton_. Now it only hurt to think of hope. It hurt _so bad._ She couldn't bring herself to give up the fragile stability she had finally found. The routine she had painstakingly shaped day after day, where there was no time to think of the past, no time to think about late night patrols, and smiles under the Eiffel Tower. No time to regret pushing him away, and always keeping the wall of their masks between them. Because she didn't _deserve_ to miss him. Because it was her fault that they couldn't find each other. Because she should have stayed through the aftermath of the fight, through the beeps of her miraculous, if only for a moment after that last battle. She should have allowed herself to see him, allowed herself to be seen, just once. But she hadn't done that. Because she hadn't known it was going to be last chance she got.

* * *

_Six years ago_

Marinette reached blindly to turn off her alarm. She stayed in bed for a moment, searching for the energy required to wake up. Marinette felt terrible, like every single part of her body was covered in bruises, and her brain was too angry to deal with thinking, and her muscles had decided rebellion was the adequate course of action. Then she remembered the reason for her current state and the pain was suddenly easier to bear. _Hawkmoth was gone._ She couldn't stop her lips from twitching into a faint smile even as she sat up with a half grown and blinked sleep away from her eyes. 

"We did it Tikki" She breathed out with an incredulous giggle that turned into a wide smile. "We finally did it!" 

The pure joy of having defeated Hawkmoth once and for all have her all the strength she needed to get out of bed and start getting ready for school. Marinette couldn't wait to see her friends and smile and laugh with them without worrying that someone would need Ladybug the second she let her guard down. She couldn't wait to meet up with Chat freely, without the burden of saving the city. She wanted to do so many things with him, talking with him and laughing and knowing him as she had never before allowed herself to know him. _Her partner._

Her smile only grew wider as she thought of all the possibilities. Of everything she could do now that Hawkmoth was gone. Everything _they_ could do. So she rummaged through her closet with no restraint, looking for an outfit that fit her mood. And she beamed like the sun was riding for the first time, and she bummed a happy song and danced through her morning, all the while keeping a steady flow of chatter, of dreams and hopes for her new life.

"This is wonderful Tikki! Look it's even snowing!" She exclaimed happily as she looked outside. "Wait, have you seen my boots?" Marinette asked, as she tried to find shoes that would keep her warm and wouldn't get ruined in the snow. But there was no answer.

"Tikki? Where are you? Are you honestly still asleep?" 

There was no gentle snoring coming from her bed.

"Tikki? I'm gonna be late if we don't hurry up!" 

There was no answering voice telling her she would make it on time.

"Tikki? Did you fall asleep in my bag again?"

There was no kwami sleeping in her bag. 

"TIKKI! Tikki where are you?"

There was no answer.

There was no one to answer.

And as she reached towards her earrings with a last attempt at summoning Tikki, there was no Miraculous to find.

Later, through tears and panicked cries, Marinette would find only a tiny note.

_Thank you Marinette._

_You were the perfect ladybug._

_ _

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for giving this story a chance. Don't hesitate to tell me what you think of it, I'd love some feedback.
> 
> This story has no beta.


End file.
